Planning Today's Informal Engagement Party

Most couples think an engagement party is too formal for them, too pretentious and not necessary. That's because they are thinking about engagement parties of the past. Engagement parties used to occur mainly in high society, just like coming out parties. Today's engagement party has another purpose and is normally much more low key. Think of it as an opportunity for the friends and families to meet one another. It can be as informal as pizza and sodas, or a barbeque at the park. The main purpose is for all of the participants to feel comfortable with each other before the pre-wedding events and the wedding itself.

Although formal invitations aren't necessary, it's an opportunity to mention “no presents please...only the presence of your company will be appreciated”. There are, however, some people who may want to offer a small gift and something like an inexpensive wedding countdown clock, a gag gift bag of “training treats for new husbands” or a “hubby helper toolbelt” would be appropriate, especially from a soon to be in-law.

Some of the women may be attending the same bridal showers in the future, and this initial contact will make everyone feel more at ease. They may even end up working together regarding the planning or sharing of expenses. But, remember, an engagement party is mainly about having fun in a celebratory way. Decorations and supplies can be disposable, just like at a picnic. Dress can be very casual. Gifts and favors are unnecessary, however, save the date magnets, small tokens with the couples names, or personalized decorations will add to the festive atmosphere. Giving ID buttons to each guest when they arrive will help break the ice and make it easier to remember who's who.

Here are three things to keep in mind when planning an informal engagement party:

1. Limit the invitations to family members and friends who will be part of the wedding.

2. Keep the atmosphere low key and comfortable. You may want to add some unobtrusive background music. Make it clear from the beginning that this is an opportunity for those closest to the couple to meet each other in a relaxed way.

3. Don't upstage the wedding by having the engagement party too close to the wedding date. An engagement party should be held as soon as reasonably possible to the engagement announcement.